U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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