The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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