I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
