I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
