I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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