I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Enjoy the penises
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
