I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Found your dick twin last night
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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