The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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