I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
