i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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