dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Randomize
