were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize