She said her name was "party"
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
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