Who did Billy Mays play for?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
