I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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