this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
