I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
