I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
