I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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