You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
