this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
