It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
