just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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