I'm so fucking centered right now
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
