Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
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