He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Just high enough for therapy.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
