Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
soo... how was my night?
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