Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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