Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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