BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
We have started to decorate penises.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
