i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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