I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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