So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Sorry my hands just texted you
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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