if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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