You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
