If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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