The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
