Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
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