True but thats because hes a fetus.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize