As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Found your dick twin last night
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
