So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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