i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize
