If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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