is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I touched a dick in church today
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
