Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Are my feet made of real feet?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Holy sore nipples Batman
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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