She said her name was "party"
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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