all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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