just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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