She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I'm both gender and math confused
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
