im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Randomize
